Valentine’s Week …. The Married Man Special !!!
Since, most of my friends are married, I thought I would do one post on Valentine’s Week, specially for the Married Men too.
07th Feb – Rose Day: You explain to your wife how Roses are way too expensive and impractical and that she would throw it away the next day, in any case. Waste of money. You end up taking her out to dinner, which costs way more than a Rose.
08th Feb – Propose Day: She expects you to propose to her all over again on this day. But you have already done that and you completely forget about it. You will get cold Daal Rice in the evening for dinner and a lecture in the night instead of a cuddle.
09th Feb – Chocolate Day: When was the last time you bought a Chocolate which was not for your Kids?? You Forget about it entirely and despite the hints from Cadbury on every TV channel.
10th Feb – Teddy Day: You tell your Wife that she is your Teddy Bear. She thinks you called her Fat. You sleep out on the couch.
11th Feb – Promise Day: Your Wife takes charge and makes you promise to gift her a Diamond ring. You are ready to promise anything just so that you dont get Daal Rice and can get back to your bed instead of the couch.
12th Feb – Hug Day: You Hug your Wife. That was Easy. NO !!! It wasnt. You forgot your promise of the Diamond Ring. It wasnt just a Hug that she was looking for. You find your Pillow on the Couch when you get back home from the Office.
13th Feb – Kiss Day: Your wife gives you a lovely kiss as soon as you wake up. Your neck is aching from sleeping on the couch. You ask her where is your Morning Tea. Thats the only Kiss you are going to get in the whole day.
14th Feb – Valentine’s Day: You want to make up for the whole lost week. You take your wife out for a candlelit dinner. Every place is Over priced. You end up paying Rs. 5000 instead of Rs. 1500 which you thought initially. You come home looking forward to some great Sex. Wife Falls asleep because she has had too much wine. You end up watching a late night show of Sooryavansham on Sony Max and cursing St. Valentine’s under your breath.
15th Feb: You have spent half your Salary trying to make up to your wife for a Week which was made up by the Marketing Geniuses of Hallmark and Archie’s. You have managed to piss of your wife throughout the week and your Boss is screaming his head for you reporting late.
If you look at it, things dont change much for the Married Men. They spend the whole time being an Ass the whole week and end up being scolded.
As for the Wives, maybe…..just maybe, if you play your cards right, you might end up getting a Diamond Ring out of it sometime during the year.
The Husbands who do shower their Wives with Expensive Gifts throughout this week are probably having an affair with some hot Secretary of theirs.
Disclaimer: The Husbands whose Wives suddenly start appreciating their Loyalty because they DID NOT give a Gift can Thank Me at a convenient time. I accept DDs and payments in Kind too.