Sex Gets Men Closer to God …. and how … !!!

“HAVING SEX MAKES MEN MORE LIKELY TO BELIEVE IN GOD”, a recent study has concluded.
And I totally tend to believe this survey !!
Infact there were so many hints that not only having sex, but even thinking of sex got you closer to God or atleast got you thinking about him.

Imagine all those desperate guys who are trying to get their rocks off. Dont they all go like, “Hey Bhagwan, buss ek ladki dila de please please please” … its not as if God is going to facilitate that for them, but praying for a miracle does take one closer to God, doesnt it?

And also those married men who come home at night praying, “Please God, let my wife not have a headache ….. atleast not tonight”
If just, not getting sex, gets you to believe in God, think about what a believer you would turn out to be if you actually have sex.
Even those men who are blessed with regular sex, must agree to the numerous occasions when the cries of “Oh My God !! Oh My God !!” hasnt brought an all-knowing smile to their face.

And when those cries are combined with a “Oh My God, I am coming” you almost feel like saying, “Hey wait, not without me. I coming with you”.

Ofcourse, in both these cases, its all about asking the God to wait while you get closer to him and join him in heaven, and you thought it was something else???
Then ofcourse, there are those people who are so charming that they never have a problem in getting a woman to fall for their charms and have a roll in the haystack with them. Usually those guys either think they ARE God or atleast God’s gift to women.
The way they strut around with a look of “I am the Master of all I survey” with the ever present packet of condoms in their wallets shows their firm belief, in their being a case of divinity.

Damnit !! I knew we had it wrong, right from the start, when we tried to encourage celibacy as a means to go closer to God. We were actually going in the opposite direction all the time.

So, now that I firmly believe in this survey and its conclusions, I am guessing that Atheists must be rather lonely beings who have never had sex and thats what makes them refute even the existence of God !! Hah !!! Atheists ….. we are on to you.
The only thing that makes me wonder what is the criteria to become the Pope?? Or maybe that is not related to this survey?? I wouldnt know.
However, I hope Gays take a leaf out of this survey and use it to their advantage. They should claim that all they were trying, were different means to get closer to God whenever some religious nut tries to debase them about their “abnormality”. Coz after all, dont all religions say that the road to the destination that is God doesnt matter, its the end result that matters…. just tell them you are taking the back road and its a short cut to God 😉
Disclaimer: I am not sure how many different sections of society are going to be offended by this post. I have made an honest effort to offend everyone equally. To those who were not offended, I apologise, I will try to do better in my further posts. To those who were offended, Go F*** yourself ……. you will feel closer to God. 😉

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